It doesn’t matter if you and everyone else in the room are thinking it. You don’t say the words. Words are weapons. They blast big bloody holes in the world. And words are bricks. Say something out loud and it starts turning solid. Say it loud enough and it becomes a wall you can’t get through. – Richard Kadrey, Kill the Dead.
Words are powerful things. Have you ever really thought about it? All that exists was created with words. All that exists in your personal reality has been created by the words you’ve spoken.
The first time I experienced the power of words, I was five or six years old. There was a teenage boy in our sunday school class that would tease me relentlessly. One particularly bad Sunday, riding home in the car with my grandmother, I exclaimed “I hate him! I wish he was dead!” The following Sunday in church, I learned this young man had been killed in a car accident. Of course I was convinced I had caused this awful thing to happen. I was beside myself with grief and guilt. Now, would this have happened regardless? I would like to believe so. This was one lesson that made a deep and lasting impression on me.
I’m sure you’ve heard the saying ‘Be careful what you wish for.’ Nothing could be closer to the truth. Words expressed carelessly in the heat of the moment can swiftly return to wreak havoc in your life. Oftentimes you’ve forgotten what you said and don’t understand why something is happening. Chances are, if you sift back through your memory, you’ll recall the exact statement that’s responsible for the current mayhem.
One overly stressful day at our restaurant, I again made a statement that would cause me grief. All of my children and their respective boyfriends/girlfriends were there helping out. There was a lot of bickering back and forth and tattling going on that day. I don’t handle negativity well at all. That combined with a hectic lunch rush had me stressed to my absolute limit. Stepping out back for a quiet moment with my husband, I was near tears. “I don’t want my kids anymore!” I shout whispered. (This is not one of my proudest moments.) Immediately I clamped my hand over my mouth with a horrified expression. “Oh my god, I didn’t mean that! I didn’t mean that! That’s not what I meant! I just can’t take their bickering and fighting today!” Too late. Within six weeks all but one of my children had moved out on their own. This turned out to be a good thing, but at the time it was rough. I kept thinking ‘You did this.’ I’m happy to report though, that my grown children are now making their own way in the world and I am enjoying the stress free quiet that has become my life.
These were a couple of tough lessons for me and they are all about what not to say. How about what we should say. Let’s take this the other direction and think about the good we can create in our lives and the lives of others. This is what a witch does when she/he casts a spell. When she/he speaks an incantation with intention behind it, they bring good things about.
Please also understand that I am not implying that you should ignore feelings or emotions. There are many emotions in our human spectrum and they are all equally important. What matters is that we deal with them in a way that isn’t harmful to ourselves or others. In my second example, I was overly stressed and upset. Long term, this can cause ill health, so it was important that something change for me. Rather than spout off at the mouth and say something ugly, I could have expressed my needs differently. “All of this negativity is really bringing me down. How can we change it?” That ugly statement I made came from my inability to give my emotions credence. This is not to say I never have a really bad day. This is where cuss words come in handy. I can let loose a string of cuss words better than any sailor. They’re pretty much nonsense and they make my husband laugh, which makes me laugh, and I’ve alleviated the building frustration within and not caused any major harm.
We must be careful with our words – we’re like superheroes and words are our super powers. Super powers should always be used to help others. – Dianna Hardy, The Spell of Summer
Another common epithet is ‘If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.’ My children have heard this over and over again. I’ve practiced rephrasing things in a positive way so often that it’s become habit. Say good things everyday. Say good things about your husband or wife, your children, the neighbors you don’t like. Even if you don’t feel they’re true. Remember, you are creating with your words. It will become true. This applies to yourself as well. What do you want to change about yourself? Positive self (I am) statements can make all the difference. I am fit and healthy. I am happy. I am talented and successful. I’m not talking about repeated affirmations. I’m talking about a sustained habit of good statements about yourself. Make your statements, then allow them to come true. I am: becoming.
I am challenging you to one full day of purposeful positive statements. No negativity allowed. Tell your husband he is the best husband in the world. Tell your children how smart and talented they are. Tell your neighbor how awesome their thumping stereo system is. Tell yourself how kind, wonderful, capable you are. Every time a negative statement crosses through your mind change it up to a positive statement and say it out loud. Then sit back and watch what happens.
If enough of us can speak the right words, we can change the world. That’s how powerful our words are. They can create and they can destroy. They can heal and they can wound. The words you permit to cross your lips can make huge changes in your life and in the lives of those you love. It’s up to you what those changes will be.
Wishing you a magic filled day,